I have a new coaching offering that I think will really help people who are hurt by someone they love.
It’s called the Intimacy Intensive. It’s a series of three interconnected, but independent, classes that use the Work of Byron Katie to heal and create more love in your most intimate relationships – namely, your relationships with your spouse or partner, your parents, and your children.
I’m offering it because I’ve noticed friends, family members, and clients suffering in these areas of life. I’ve also experienced revolutions in these areas of my own life as a result of doing the Work – as my teacher Martha Beck says, “If you spot it, you got it!” I see it because I suffered, too, and I know that the Work can help. Dramatically.
The format of the classes is influenced by my recent experience at the School for the Work.
The School was an immersion: nine days out of everyday life in which participants could go deep into their pain, shift it at the foundation, and create positive momentum to take back home. Katie would introduce an area of Inquiry, out of which came Work we did as a group, with partners, and alone. The Work brought me – brought all of us – so much relief, peace, and love. We lifted one another up and our joy grew collectively.
For the Intimacy Intensive, we will create as immersive an experience as possible while still allowing participants to remain at home. Each class – partners, parents, and children – is a broad area of Inquiry, which I’ll break down into sub-topics, with a new sub-topic each week. We’ll do the Work together on our weekly group calls, and then you’ll go deep into the week’s topic with your facilitation partner, alone, and also with me. Six weeks of daily Work and the depth of the topics are what make this class “intensive.” But deep work for a sustained period is what will create the shift you are looking for, the end of your suffering.
The Work is, itself, intense. There’s no hiding in it. You actively question what you thought you knew. You look for your errors in judgment and at how your critics were right about you! It’s walking into the mouth of the beast!
But, oh! Picture it. What would it be like – to not run anymore, but turn and face what (painful thinking) hounds you, to drop your defenses and really look at what it’s trying to tell you? I’ll tell you. Wisdom. Freedom. Love.
When it comes to your intimates, isn’t that what you want? You can stop prosecuting old grievances, trying to control or change them and needing their approval. You can experience love without conditions.
That doesn’t mean you’ll never been in pain again. But in the Intimacy Intensive, you’ll get so much practice doing the Work alone, and you’ll make a dozen new best friends to reach out to for facilitation when you need it, that you’ll always have a way out of pain.
Enrollment for the first class, Partners, opens today. I had said that participants must have read Katie’s book Loving What Is and have done Work before, but never mind that. The only prerequisites are that you have some areas of chronic pain with him or her and you want to be happier.
You don’t even have to be with the partner in question anymore. The Work can set you free from your ex.
Maybe he leaves the toilet seat up and chews with his mouth open. Maybe she’s frigid and prioritizes the kids over you. Maybe he has a temper. Maybe she had an affair, and you can’t get past it. There is no problem too small or too large for the Work.
For those who want to enroll but have no experience with the Work, do please check out thework.com. Watch Katie do the Work in the videos and try it for yourself, using the instructions and resources provided there. The Work is an experience, not an intellectual exercise. I also share many of my experiences with Inquiry on my blog.
If you’ve done the Work and experienced its sweet relief, please share a story in the comments!